Why You Should Not Snoop On Your Woman’s Affairs
Snooping is a desperate, paranoid act, and both of those
kill attraction--it's a guaranteed way to ruin a relationship. If she's got
something to tell you, she will. The truth is, there are many reasons women
cheat and keep it to themselves, and if she hasn't broken up with you, it may
be a fling that dies down. After all, it's not the act itself that
creates emotional turmoil; it's the knowing about the act.
A few months ago, a friend of mine called me up, distraught because he'd been
snooping in his girlfriend's email and text messages,affairs and came to the
conclusion that she was cheating on him.
He told me he was going to confront "that lying woman" about it-I advised
patience, to see if that was really the case. I also told him that
snooping never leads to anything good--if she's going to cheat, she's going to
do it regardless of his snooping.
Sure enough, he confronted her (against my advice) and it
all went sideways. Turns out she wasn't cheating after all, just corresponding
with a former boyfriend she was still friends with. But his snooping ended the
relationship, and it darn well should have.
Look here, guys who are insecure snoop. Not only that,
you may find partial information that appears incriminating, but really isn't and
wind up ruining a good thing like this guy did.
Even if she is cheating, what's your desired outcome? To break up with
her? To end the cheating and stay with her? To maintain the relationship
as it is?
The thing to do, however, is to control what you can control-your
own behavior. If a woman cheats, more than likely it's because her man is
not meeting some of her needs. You need to get straight on what those
are, and focus on creating the environment to where she's attracted to you, and
uninterested in others.
Snooping is not the way to do that. It's a good way to drive a woman to
cheat, and a good way to end a relationship. So, whatever you do, don't
snoop otherwise let sleeping dogs lie in peace of mind.
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